Why I Do What I Do

This is a note. Notes, for me, are something that didn't quite deserve as much length as a full blog post. Allowing myself to write notes helps me write things without committing to a long and lengthy exposition :)

I thought today about why I do what I do.

When I was a child, I yearned very deeply to be seen and recognized for who I truly was. I didn’t quite realize the cause of this, or reason. I couldn’t have articulated it had I tried. Nevertheless, it was there.

However, though I tried desperately, nobody ever saw me or recognized me, and so I grew up with this profound sense of isolation, of misunderstanding, of invisibility. I couldn’t even express or name that which I suffered from; the closest I got was to call myself alien. I remember thinking to myself “I am missing a fundamental part of the human experience, because to be human is to be understood, and to belong, and I have neither of those.”

Today, what I strive to do is build things that bring delight and wholeness to others, that they might create ideas of beauty, and build expressions of their soul. I want nothing more than to build a world in which people collaborate with each other. To build a world in which people build beautiful creations, see each other’s creations, and see each other deeply.

I will pursue this until I have rebuilt the heavens, the hells, and the celestials, if necessary.

Every single time I build something that sparks light in someone else’s eyes, a part of my inner child heals.

Every single time I hear someone say “I feel like I can create now because of the things you do,” my soul finds the peace it has been searching for.

Why do I do what I do? It’s simple: I want to build a world in which people look at the things that each-other have built and say “I see this, and I see you, and what I see is beautiful.”